Book Image

The Manager's Guide to Mediating Conflict

By : Alison J Love
Book Image

The Manager's Guide to Mediating Conflict

By: Alison J Love

Overview of this book

Table of Contents (10 chapters)

Deep listening skills


 

To listen fully means to pay attention to what is being said beneath the words. You listen not only to the "music", but to the essence of the person speaking. You listen not only for what a person knows, but for what he or she is.

 
 --–Peter Senge

Listening skills are the single most important skill that a mediator needs to master. Most of us are not good at listening; we are taught to speak, to write, and to read, but we are not taught to listen. With practice, however, you can improve your listening skills.

As a mediator, you need to learn to listen at a deep emphatic level, which requires real and sustained concentration. Empathetic listening means that you listen to more than the words that are spoken. You need to listen to the emotions and feelings underneath the words and to the non-verbal communication. It is also important that you demonstrate to the other person that you have listened and understood. However hard you might try, it is impossible to multitask while...