I once heard a CEO remark that he intended to be "Tough on the issue, not on the person." It didn't feel like it from where I was standing!

Perhaps a sharp word or thoughtless act has violated your personal boundaries at some point; the core values and principles that you hold most sacred were not respected and it left you feeling uncomfortable. A degree of this is inevitable in work and indeed life, and as a newly appointed manager, this isn't going to go away.

What will change, however, is that you will start to interact more with the upper levels of leadership in your organization–they tend to be the people with the strongest personalities. There may have been times when you walked away from a dialog feeling trampled upon, but if you previously felt unable to let the other person know that it wasn't okay, then rest assured that will change by the end of this section...